Friday, August 15, 2014
Day 1: Abundance
I was not ready for this blog when I started it a month ago; I published three posts and then didn't come back until today. Sometimes it is best to not force things, I have found (and as some of my past abandoned blogs can attest). But something always draws me back to writing as a means of processing my feelings. I don't think I am a particularly amazing writer, but it feels natural to pour out through words.
Tomorrow at 7:30am, it will have been 6 months since Haven's birth. I can hardly believe it, really. I wonder what she would look like now and what memories and experiences we would have stored up. I do not ever stop missing her. This "monthiversary" is harder than the past few have been because it is more of a milestone; everything just feels more significant somehow. I try very hard not to think of our other family - the one that would have been. But sometimes I can't help but imagine what they are doing. Maybe they are knee-deep in diapers and puke, laughing at something or other. Or maybe they are stealing a few prized moments of sleep while the little miss is conked out and milk-drunk.
But we keep moving forward, one foot in front of the other. Life is good. Or it will be again.
Today, I am grateful for some recent financial blessings which have brought us to a place where we are now able to give to others in the way that others gave to us so generously during the past 7 years. We have struggled financially since we first met, and this is the first time that we feel we have a relative abundance. I don't think that you have to be wealthy to give; there are so many ways to help people who need it. But it is nice to have enough to reach out a helping hand when an opportunity presents itself.
This story (click here) is what gave me my inspiration for today's post. While our situations are entirely different, I do know what it is like to battle something that most people do not understand, and what it is like to feel desperate and alone. All the best, Bobby and Lindsay Earle (and Clive!) My thoughts are with you today.